Manic Depression's a Frustratin' Mess...

So I find myself here, feeling depressed and like a considerable failure. I always just seem to find myself distracted, not finishing the things that I really should. It seems I constantly have things added to my to-do list, and nothing ever gets to-done. And now most of the girlfriend's friends have pretty much quick contacting us. Before I moved down here, they all seemed very happy for her. Now we could all go out as a group and have fun together, and she wouldn't be the single person there like a third wheel. Now, though, the former roommate who has since moved out really doesn't talk to us at all, and of course most of his friends and such don't really talk to us much either, since their real connection with us was through him. And the girlfriend's best friend doesn't really answer her phone or return messages any more, so we haven't really seen her for a month and a half.

Of course, a large part of the reason I moved down here to north Texas was so that I could find a band, which I thought would be considerably easier here than in southern Oregon. Of course, it probably would wind up being easier if I actually followed up with any of the leads that I had obtained when I first moved down here. But, being the lazy ass that I am, I didn't follow through with most of them for one lame reason or another, and the few that I did, I either let slide after the initial contact or else I just didn't like the music that the group was playing. I was playing with one guy for a while who was doing music that I enjoyed, but it was all covers, and it just seemed like I didn't have a whole lot of input into what we were playing. Then my car broke down, and between how I was feeling about things and the problems with getting to his place to jam, I just let it drop. I shouldn't have, but I can't do much about it now. I really need to get back off my ass and put up another ad or two on Craigslist and see if I can't generate a little more interest. See if I can find someone who wants to jam on some original material but isn't necessarily out to change the world with their music. We'll see if I can do something about getting back in that flow this weekend.

And my work has just been a royal pain in the ass. Everything was initially moving along just fine, but since I've been here, I've run into a few little sticking points in the programming, and I got lazy about doing as much stuff as I should have during the day. I'm kind of left alone over here in my little corner all day, and it's easy for me to just screw off a fair portion of the day. And, unfortunately, I've spent too much time doing that and too little trying to figure out the problems I've been having with the programming. And now it's come to the point where I really need to get the stuff done immediately, and I'm just having a hard time even concentrating on what I'm doing.

So I guess my plan for the weekend is as follows: When I get home this evening, I'm going to clean the cat's litter box and water dish, and finish doing the dishes if the girlfriend hasn't already done so. Actually, before I get started with the litter box and such, I'm going to get a load of laundry running, since I'm way behind on that, too. Somewhere along in there, I also need to make sure that I take out the garbage, since we have a bunch sitting in the laundry room waiting to go out. I should also make a special run down to the recycling center and get rid of a bunch of the crap that's in the closet under the stairs. After I finish doing the dishes and cleaning the litter box, I'm going to gather up all of my Dremel equipment that is currently sitting in the living room and put it in one of the totes that I have sitting up in my room upstairs. Following all of that, which really shouldn't take all that long, I will spend the remainder of the evening finishing the data-entry form for the contracts database, as well as taking screen shots to document it once it is done. I might try doing a little of the technical documentation, but that can wait a little longer as long as the database itself is up and running. One thing that I will not do this evening is have a drink, because I tend to get lazy and stupid when I do that, and I don't need it right now.

Tomorrow morning, the girlfriend wants to go see a house that she's been interested in. It's probably going to be auctioned off long before we could save up enough money for a decent down payment, but I can at least humor her and go to the open house. If she has the time and the interest, I'm going to see if she wants to run down to Home Depot or Lowe's so I can pick up a 3/8" drill bit so I can finally get her shelves hung up in her room upstairs. If she doesn't have the time or doesn't want to make that long a run out of the way, I'll go get it after she goes to work, and then I will get her shelves hung up, finally. Assuming it's not raining, my next goal after that is to get all the stuff unloaded from my old car, so I can think about getting it listed for sale. After I get the car unloaded, I'm going to write up a listing for Craigslist to see if I can find some fellow musicians to play with. I'm also going to draft at least three messages to people on various forums, although I might not send them all immediately because some of those forums are only available on my old laptop, which is currently having issues. And I'm going to write a message to Mom, because I haven't really talked to her for a while, and I should keep in more touch.

After all of that is done, I'm going to spend most of the afternoon and evening working on finishing the edit/view form for the contracts database, as well as finishing the documentation for that portion of it. I want it to be pretty much cosmetically perfect, and I want to start entering some data in to make sure it's showing up the way I want it to. If I feel like the form itself is pretty well complete, I'm going to see about making a couple loaves of bread, or perhaps some other similar kind of baked good. No cookies, though, because they just take too much time and would keep me from getting anything else done. Maybe I'll make those cinnamon rolls I was thinking about making a couple of weeks ago, though. Those would be good for breakfast on Sunday morning, too.

Speaking of Sunday morning, I would like to spend at least an hour or so picking stuff up in my room upstairs. I don't really have any good way to get everything organized as well as I would like, but at least I can get stuff off the floor and into some of those empty totes that I have sitting around up there. I think there is a hockey game Sunday afternoon, so I'm going to take a little time off and watch that, maybe have myself a nice cup of coffee with some Irish cream, but then I need to get back to it. For programming, I'm going to try to complete both the payment report and the payment reconciliation module, as well as hopefully being able to complete a couple of other reports that I think Deana might find handy. Documentation for those in at least a basic mode. And I need to write a couple of search functions for her, because she asked for them before.

Since I will hopefully have picked up a fair amount of stuff in the upstairs room, I'm going to get the old laptop set up and send off the messages I hope to draft on Saturday, if I haven't already sent them off prior to that. I'd also like to go through the old 43Things list and see what needs to be weeded out of there and what other things I need to add to the list. We'll see whether I have time for that, though. In the evening, I'm going to take a shower, read some of my ASP.Net AJAX book, and try to get myself rested up for the coming day. I'll hopefully check in to see how everything's going, too. We'll see, though...